Monday, October 21, 2013

Breaking Up Blues- Blog post 9

Why is it, when you break up with someone you thought you loved that it feels like your life has fallen apart, and yet you know that everything will turn out all right in the end? Why does it have to be so painful?  [question] First, you find yourself in shock, then in tears, then you are angry, and then the whole process repeats again. [use of then] "It gets better" people say. "This too will fade away." I believe them, but when I am all alone and feel so weak, that's when I miss him. That's when I want his arms around me and I don't want to move on-- to let go. [dash to emphasize point] I just want him, flaws and all.

I know he left me because he loves me and he doesn't want to hurt me any more by his depression, his mistakes and the way he draws back and avoids me because he doesn't feel that he is good enough, and because he wants to get his life back together. I still miss him. [complex sentence 30 words plus, followed by short one]

I miss his smile and the way he smells and feels. I miss his impulsive decisions and the way he worried about me being warm enough and the way he would refuse to kiss me when he was sick because he didn't want to infect me. [complex sentence using and, and no commas] I miss his excitement over something new that he has learned, and I miss his passion for teaching them to me. I miss the way he notices when other people need help and offers his assistance. I miss the way he opened doors for me, how  he held on tight and seemed to never want to let go. But he did. He did.

After now, nothing will ever be the same. [one sentence paragraph]

They say I can get someone better than him. Someone who won't break my heart, who isn't "damaged goods. But I don't want anyone else. I know life will go on. Perhaps we will get back together, perhaps I will find someone new. However, [Use of the word however] whatever happens I don't want my heart to ever break this way again. Ever.

Will I get better? [rhetorical question] Of course I will, but time can only tell when.


Sunday, October 13, 2013

On Andreas Capellanus and the Art of Courtly Love


The first thing that stood out to me was the fact that the author (a clergyman) focuses on romantic love. [appositive set off by parentheses]This is ridiculous, because he says that love- in a general term- cannot exist between two members of the same gender. [appositive set off by dashes] This is ludicrous because all people can love one another, be it two men or two women, and not (necessarily) be transgender. [appositive set off by commas] Think mother daughter relationships, brothers, and friends. Obviously, people who are transgender can love one another as well, and the thought that this is impossible is laughable, although perhaps at that time, being a clergy man, the author had to make some distinction about why being transgender was not acceptable. [participial phrase] I think a distinction between types of love should be made here from the very beginning.

Personally, I find it quite obvious that the “love” spoken about here is lust. For example, he states that people over 50 can’t be in love, nor can girls under 12 and boys under 14. Ok, so who decides this? Yes, the first number is about the time people become less sexually active, and the second two are when boys and girls hit puberty. I find it funny though that these specific ages are mentioned, as it differs for everyone. However, the idea that the magic age for love is between these numbers is hilarious, especially as I know a spry man who is still energetic and lucid even  in his 80’s and has been married to three different women in the past ten years; they kept dying off. [adjectives out of order and appositive with a semicolon] I’m pretty sure love had to do with these marriages, but not so much lust.

This work goes on, and I feel that I could write a lot about it. However, I think I will end here and state that in the light of today’s world, this work may have a few truths to it, but it is mainly ridiculous and amusing. I am very grateful to live in this day and age.

Saturday, September 28, 2013

AAAWWUBBIS and a Paper For My Voice Class


When [aaawwubbis] I first arrived at the concert I was running about seven minutes late. And when I say seven minutes, I mean seven minutes after the concert should have started. It also turns out that the programs had run out. Because [sentence beginning with because] I was running late, I ended up standing outside of the double doors waiting for the series of songs to end where I could (not very) discreetly sneak into the back. But for all of the hassle and bad timing, I was very glad that I came, not only because this was the only period for which I could make the concert, but because I saw and heard something that I really enjoyed.

I have never been to a live operatic concert before, though I have heard plenty of opera music. I was very impressed with the tone of Dr. Weick’s voice. She has a very clear bell like voice with rich undertones. Her projection is amazing; [use of a semi-colon] I could hear her very clearly from the back row. It was also interesting to watch how she positioned her mouth while singing. I recognized the way she elongated her mouth to improve her resonance from class, and how she breathed from her diaphragm to get maximum capacity. I was extremely impressed by how long she could go without breathing, and then her breaths seemed to hardly take any time. Another thing I noticed that she did that was the same as we do in class was that she would stand in the curve of the piano, and before she started a song, she would look down and collect herself, though in class I am certainly not as calm and collected.[compound sentence with though] When [aaawwubbis]she looked up it acted as a signal to the pianist to start the piece. Then before and after she started singing, she gave the audience a small modest smile. It was interesting to see things we have been learning put in action.

When [aaawwubbis] Dr. Weick was singing for the first three sections, I realized that the reason people choose to sing in different languages than the audience can understand is because the audience focuses a lot more on the quality of the person’s voice and the sounds and notes the person is singing than the content of the song (which they can’t understand). At least, this was certainly the case for me. I also noticed that when Dr. Weick was singing in different languages she had a stand to put her music on. I was curious whether this was to help her remember the words or notes or both for the song.  I was very impressed with the range Dr. Weick could reach because she hit some very high notes. [end sentence with because clause] From there she quickly descended down the scale to reach low notes which I know isn’t easy for me to do. I wonder how long it takes to train one’s registers to reach notes in that succession. For one, in order to do this, a singer needs to be able to find their register breaks; embrace their own voice style; and be able to coordinate their timing and breath. [semicolons for super comma]

When [aaawwubbis] she reached the forth section where Dr. Weick sang songs in English she became visibly much more animated with the songs. Previously she stood still in a good posture position for singing, but her emotions were minimal while she was singing. Nor [sentence beginning with nor] did she seem to fill the stage the same way she filled the auditorium. After [aaawwubbis] taking stage in a language the whole audience could understand, she seemed to fill her presence more. I loved the way she became almost imp like with her singing. I was right along with the rest of the audience laughing at her expressions. Her expressions certainly added to the experience of the performance and this endued the song with more meaning than it might have had if she had just sung. I also noticed that she got rid of the music stand, which seemed to create a more personal atmosphere with the audience.

Overall, I really enjoyed going to this concert, and may end up going to more than the required amount of performances. I feel Dr. Weick is a wonderful performer and a good visual for how a musical performance should be conducted.  I especially enjoyed the last section of her program where the audience was more engaged; it was a nice touch and I loved it.[compound sentence with semicolon]









 

Thursday, September 19, 2013

deja vu... my goals from a compound sentence perspective



When it comes to being a better writer, I have realized that I have quite a long way to go in the way of grammar. FOR INSTANCE, THERE ARE A FEW THINGS SUCH AS THE LESSER USED FORMS OF PUNCTUATION THAT I TEND TO STRUGGLE WITH, SO I USE COMMAS INSTEAD. [Compound sentence] also have issues with trying to pack too much into one paragraph.

As a writer, I feel that I have a fairly good understanding of how sentence structure should flow. How is another topic entirely however. YET, [sentence starting with a FANBOY] I have noticed that as I climb farther up in the scale of academic writing that I have no idea when it is appropriate to use en-dashes, em-dashes, tildes, and the like. I also have a tendency to put too many commas into sentences, because I tend to write extra-long sentences. For example, I could be writing a paper on the birds of Ridgefield Wildlife Refuge and have a sentence in it that would look something like this: THE CANADIAN GOOSE, OR BRANTA CANADENSIS, IS TYPICALLY FOUND IN SMALL NUMBERS IN THE REFUGE, THOUGH THEIR POPULATION TENDS TO HIT ITS PEAK DURING THE TIMES OF MIGRATION, SUCH AS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE AUTUMN WHEN THE GEESE GATHER TO FEED IN THE EMPTY CORNFIELDS ON THEIR WAY SOUTH, OR TO FEED ON BUGS IN THE SPRING ON THE WAY NORTH. [compound sentence](I just made that up by the way, though those are about the times the geese are at their most abundant in Ridgefield). I feel that I have gotten a better hang of where commas should go. HOWEVER, I FEEL THAT I USE TOO MANY, AND IN SO DOING, OFTEN SACRIFICE THE LENTH OF SENTENCES FOR SHORTER ONES IN FAVOR OF GRAMMATICAL CORRECTNESS. [compound sentence] Perhaps if I learn how to appropriately use the punctuation that I am less familiar with—like ELLIPSES AND DASHES AND COLENS [series of nouns connected with and and no commas] my extra-long sentences can flow better.

Friday, September 13, 2013

Blog- Dora part VI


On "Dora Learns to Write and in the Process Encounters Punctuation" by Pat Cordeiro

I found this article very interesting, and it brought me back to my own elementary days when I was learning how to write. It made me realize that I don’t really remember my teacher teaching me how to punctuate sentences.  BY REALIZING THIS, IT MADE ME PAY EXTRA ATTENTION TO HOW THIS TEACHER TAUGHT DORA. (S-V-O with transitive verb) However, I do remember writing many stories and reading lots of books which would have given me exposure to sentence structure. I believe I could be Dora in a way after reflecting on my own education. It’s almost as if Pat Cordeiro is saying “this experience is YOURS [possessive pronoun] as well as Dora’s.”  She does a wonderful job of illustrating a functioning classroom where the teacher is allowing the children to actively take part in their own learning. The teacher does a good job of subtly directing her students toward proper punctuation without being overly critical and is patient with the process it takes to learn proper punctuation.

The teacher helps Dora learn how to punctuate sentences by allowing her to explore her own knowledge of how sentences should work, and then by directing her towards the next step of development that she should be obtaining.  The teacher first encourages her to look at a book for guidance on how words are broken into segments, and then for how the sentences look are structured. [compound subject] By doing this, Dora was able to recognize the functions of sentences as she developed an understanding for the structure of words and punctuation. Then the teacher encouraged her to read her stories aloud, and teaches her how her voice may sound when a period would be placed in a sentence. Dora’s understanding develops gradually as she gets used to punctuation and where it may be placed. I also noticed that the teacher provided time for the students to interact on their writing and skill levels. THE INTERACTION TIME ABILITATED THE CHILDREN TO REFLECT ON THE LESSONS THEY HAD LEARNED. (S-V-O with transitive verb) By doing so the children were able to learn from one another and share their own knowledge, thus each student is encouraging others in their own abilities to write. Along with encouragement from peers, the students are also able to learn through teaching others what they understand to be correct. BY TEACHING OTHERS THE CHILDREN ARE REENFORCING THE LESSON FOR THEMSELVES. (S-V-O with transitive verb)The teacher is always very encouraging in order not to dissuade any of the valuable learning experiences Dora and the other students are experiencing.

On the other hand, the teacher doesn’t discourage the children, and she doesn’t try to teach the children how to form sentences immediately. THE TEACHER UNDERSTANDS THAT LEARNING HOW TO WRITE A SENTENCE IS COMPLICATED. (S-V-O with transitive verb) This is because she understands that like spelling, sentence structure takes experience and exposure over time in order to learn to do it properly.  Not only does it take time to learn how to punctuate properly but it also takes time to develop a style of punctuation that is distinctly THEIRS [possessive pronoun]. She doesn’t expect too much out of her students and she allows them to learn at their own pace. She also doesn’t directly tell the children where to put punctuation in their sentences, but helps them find their own answers through various methods like looking at a book or reading aloud their own work.

The reason it takes so long for Dora to learn how to properly punctuate sentences is that learning how to punctuate is a long process. Learning how to structure a sentence is tricky and it takes experience and time to learn how to correctly punctuate sentences. Another reason is that while Dora and her fellow students are learning how to punctuate their sentences they often get caught up in the story they are trying to tell instead of focusing on punctuation of their story. As a result, punctuation is not as high of a priority.  A child WHOSE [possessive pronoun] priority is to learn to write well and in a way that others may understand them is more likely to become a better writer than a child who has been over taught the rules of punctuation and not given enough freedom to explore and experiment.

Though according to this article punctuation can be a long process, a teacher who is patient and willing to let children develop as they are capable can hope of encouraging children to explore their own writing style and not become discouraged by mechanics that they don’t understand at the moment. This will result in confident writers who are willing to explore and who are not inhibited by rules and criticism they may have received early on in life.

Thursday, September 5, 2013

On "Dora Learns to Write and in the Process Encounters Punctuation" by Pat Cordeiro


I found this article very interesting, and it brought me back to my own elementary days when I was learning how to write. It made me realize that I don’t really remember my teacher teaching me how to punctuate sentences. However, I do remember writing many stories and reading lots of books which would have given me exposure to sentence structure. I believe I could be Dora in a way after reflecting on my own education. It’s almost as if Pat Cordeiro is saying “this experience is YOURS [possessive pronoun] as well as Dora’s.”  She does a wonderful job of illustrating a functioning classroom where the teacher is allowing the children to actively take part in their own learning. The teacher does a good job of subtly directing her students toward proper punctuation without being overly critical and is patient with the process it takes to learn proper punctuation.

The teacher helps Dora learn how to punctuate sentences by allowing her to explore her own knowledge of how sentences should work, and then by directing her towards the next step of development that she should be obtaining.  The teacher first encourages her to look at a book for guidance on how words are broken into segments, and then for how the sentences look are structured. By doing this, Dora was able to recognize the functions of sentences as she developed an understanding for the structure of words and punctuation. Then the teacher encouraged her to read her stories aloud, and teaches her how her voice may sound when a period would be placed in a sentence. Dora’s understanding develops gradually as she gets used to punctuation and where it may be placed. I also noticed that the teacher provided time for the students to interact on their writing and skill levels. By doing so the children were able to learn from one another and share their own knowledge, thus each student is encouraging others in their own abilities to write. Along with encouragement from peers, the students are also able to learn through teaching others what they understand to be correct. The teacher is always very encouraging in order not to dissuade any of the valuable learning experiences Dora and the other students are experiencing.

On the other hand, the teacher doesn’t discourage the children, and she doesn’t try to teach the children how to form sentences immediately. This is because she understands that like spelling, sentence structure takes experience and exposure over time in order to learn to do it properly.  Not only does it take time to learn how to punctuate properly but it also takes time to develop a style of punctuation that is distinctly THEIRS [possessive pronoun]. She doesn’t expect too much out of her students and she allows them to learn at their own pace. She also doesn’t directly tell the children where to put punctuation in their sentences, but helps them find their own answers through various methods like looking at a book or reading aloud their own work.

The reason it takes so long for Dora to learn how to properly punctuate sentences is that learning how to punctuate is a long process. Learning how to structure a sentence is tricky and it takes experience and time to learn how to correctly punctuate sentences. Another reason is that while Dora and her fellow students are learning how to punctuate their sentences they often get caught up in the story they are trying to tell instead of focusing on punctuation of their story. As a result, punctuation is not as high of a priority.  A child WHOSE [possessive pronoun] priority is to learn to write well and in a way that others may understand them is more likely to become a better writer than a child who has been over taught the rules of punctuation and not given enough freedom to explore and experiment.

Though according to this article punctuation can be a long process, a teacher who is patient and willing to let children develop as they are capable can hope of encouraging children to explore their own writing style and not become discouraged by mechanics that they don’t understand at the moment. This will result in confident writers who are willing to explore and who are not inhibited by rules and criticism they may have received early on in life.

Saturday, August 24, 2013

My Writing, My Goals


My Writing, My Goals

When it comes to being a better writer, I have realized that I have quite a long way to go in the way of grammar. For instance, there are a few things, such as the lesser used forms of punctuation that I tend to struggle with, so I use commas instead. I also have issues with trying to pack too much into one paragraph.

As a writer, I feel that I have a fairly good understanding of how sentence structure should flow. How is another topic entirely however. I have noticed that as I climb farther up in the scale of academic writing that I have no idea when it is appropriate to use en-dashes, em-dashes, tildes, and the like. I also have a tendency to put too many commas into sentences, because I tend to write extra-long sentences. For example, I could be writing a paper on the birds of Ridgefield Wildlife Refuge and have a sentence in it that would look something like this: The Canadian goose, or Branta Canadensis, is typically found in small numbers in the refuge, though their population tends to hit its peak during the times of migration, such as in the middle of the autumn when the geese gather to feed in the empty cornfields on their way south, or to feed on bugs in the spring on the way north. (I just made that up by the way, though those are about the times the geese are at their most abundant in Ridgefield). I feel that I have gotten a better hang of where commas should go. However, I feel that I use too many, and in so doing, often sacrifice the length of sentences for shorter ones in favor of grammatical correctness. Perhaps if I learn how to appropriately use the punctuation that I am less familiar with—like ELLIPSES AND DASHES AND COLENS [series of nouns connected with and and no commas] my extra-long sentences can flow better.

Another thing I tend to struggle with is when to break a paragraph into another one. When I truly enjoy writing a piece, I can go on and on about a particular topic. I don’t change topics in particular, so that paragraph tends to expand into a GIGANTIC, RAMBLING, MONSTROSITY [series of adjectives connected with commas and no and's] lasting a page long, which is quite ridiculous for a simple paragraph. I just don’t know where to break the lines to make two separate paragraphs about the same topic.  I suppose if I made each sub-topic into a paragraph my paragraph monster could get separated into more manageable portions. HOW to do it however is something I should probably pay attention to in order to optimize the readability of the piece I am working on.

I am sure that this course will help me with both of these problems, as well as others that I have not yet discovered that I have. Perhaps as I understand some of the functions of grammar better, these problems will not be as much of an issue.